Weigh Me Down
by alicehatter239
Summary: It's been a few years since the incident with Bill and the puppets and the twins haven't seen him since then. When he pays Dipper a visit during their summer at Gravity Falls once again three years later, however, Dipper has a hard time staying sane without getting a little high every now and then. Sometimes he forgets that Mabel is sort of the best sister ever.


Dipper likes smoking. Casually, at least. He only does it every once in a blue moon and it's only weed, so there's really no problem with it. Mabel knows about it and she's cool with it. Heck, she even tried it once! Tried it, didn't like it, and that was that. Dipper never pressed the issue because even he doesn't do it very often. He only does it when he's feeling overwhelming amounts of stress or anger, any negative emotion, really.

They're sixteen now and they still haven't tired of coming back to Gravity Falls every summer to visit their Grunkle Stan and help around the Mystery Shack. And just like every other summer, they always find out new things about the town whether they want to or not. But this time, Dipper's not sure the trip was worth it.

Everything was completely normal when he went to sleep that night. He'd climbed into his bed and Mabel had gone into her own bed on the other side of the attic room, flicking off the light in the process. He'd fallen asleep fairly quickly, considering how busy they'd been earlier that day with the Shack. The last thing he saw before falling asleep was Mabel's dark silhouette in her bed.

Then, any bit of color that remained simply disappeared.

Dipper shot up in bed and was met with the horrifyingly familiar sight of the triangular one-eyed demon, his cane in hand. He immediately went into a state of panic, his mind working overtime to try and process the fact that Bill was here and he thought that was all over with because Bill hasn't been here in for_ever _but here he is just floating right in front of him and Dipper thought he might pass out again.

All he knew was that Bill was making some sort of vague threat about his family and the future and Dipper didn't know what to do with that. It simply aggravated him more and made him want to hide under his covers and pull Mabel and Wendy and Soos and Grunkle Stan under there with him and stay there forever. After all, if you're all the way under the blankets, the monsters can't hurt you.

But he knew that wasn't the case this time around. It's never really been the case. Bill disappeared in a flash and left Dipper to jolt awake in bed once again, this time in a dark room with Mabel in the bed across from him.

And his memories.

Oh, god, not again. This wasn't happening again. He couldn't stand thinking of what happened those few years ago; how Bill had literally used Dipper's body as a puppet and had tried to ruin absolutely everything. He'd hurt his body so badly, _so _damn badly then. Dipper could suddenly feel his limbs and head and his entire _being _just ache all over again.

That's why tonight, he's retreated up to the roof of the Shack to smoke until he can't feel his own existence anymore. It works for the most part, his back leaned against the roof as he rests on the little platform. He giggles every now and then at nothing in particular. Problem is, this has become a habit now. It's been almost a month since Bill decided to visit him and Dipper's been coming out here to smoke every night or even in the afternoon and morning to try and get high so he can relax. When he's not high as a kite, he's paranoid and nervous and so _so _scared that Bill is going to show up at any second to do whatever he said he was going to do that night he visited. The worst part about it, Dipper thinks, is that he doesn't even _know _what Bill said. He knows he threatened his family, but what exactly that threat was is still a mystery to him.

Tonight, though, Dipper is almost surprised to see Mabel climbing up to sit with him, wrapping her legs around her knees as she plops down next to him. Dipper doesn't say anything, doesn't even laugh as he has what Mabel thinks is some sort of staring contest with the view in front of them. She sighs.

"Hey, brobro, you okay?" She asks quietly. "You've been coming out here a lot lately. It's starting to worry me, y'know?"

Dipper snorts, slapping a hand to his stomach. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine!" He grins, nodding. "Totally fine. Spick and span. Right as rain. I'm just constantly plagued with the memory of Bill taking over my body and hurting it so badly that I threw up on the way to the hospital out of pain and exhaustion. Remember that? Fun times. Oh, right, and the fact that he's _back _and is planning on probably trying to hurt you guys again!" He doubles over on himself in laughter, staying hunched over like that for a moment as his laughter fades out until it's small, quick spurts of laughter. He leans back again and wraps his own arms around his midsection, tears prickling at the corners of his eyes and spilling over despite his laughter. He can't see how Mabel is looking at him with an expression of pure concern and slight fear as he digs the heels of his palms into his eyes and breaks down into tears.

"I'm scared, Mabel," he chokes out, "I'm so fucking scared. I can't keep doing this, I thought he was gone. I thought he was gone forever."

Through his sobbing, he can hear Mabel standing up and retreating and for a moment he thinks that she just doesn't care enough to stay and help or even listen to him. Anger flashes through him for the briefest second before he feels something like wool pressed against his hands and face. When he pulls his hands away from his eyes, he sees through his blurry vision that it is indeed a wool sweater, and Mabel is the one holding it out to him. He can feel his lips twitch upward into a small, weak smile and he takes the sweater just like he did when they were twelve and he couldn't sleep after he'd gotten his body back and Mabel didn't know what else to do to try and comfort him. It had worked then, and it'll work now.

His sister sits beside him as he pulls her sweater on over his head and looks down at it. In the dim light of the full moon, he can see that it's the one she'd sewn the bright words _Dipper is Awesome _into. It takes him a moment to read, though, because everything is a little swirly thanks to the drug. Regardless, he feels a wave of calmness wash over him and suddenly he's twelve again and Mabel is sitting on his bed with him and telling him it's okay to be scared and that anything he feels is valid. This time, she sits in silence and Dipper appreciates the hell out of that. The sweater and her presence are more than enough. When she puts her arm around his shoulders, he leans into it and sets his head on her shoulder, his eyes half-lidded.

"...'m sleepy," he murmurs. Mabel leans back against the roof of the house, dragging Dipper down with her. He rests comfortably against her shoulder and the roof and he smiles once again, closing his eyes.

Worrying about Bill can wait.


End file.
